I'm ashamed to say that my depression has finally got to much. It has become debilitating to the point of affecting my daily life and so I went to see my doctor this morning. He knows me and he as knows that I know my depression so I was just a case of 'doc, my depression is back and I can't shake it off. I've had it since October' and a very brief chat about the pros and cons of one medication over another and 2 minutes later I walked out with a prescription for anti-depressants.
I feel ashamed of myself - I couldn't cope, why can't I just be a happier and thankful for what I have etc. On the other hand I know that in about 5 days I will feel a whole lot better and if you have an illness that's debilitating and there is a treatment for it then it would be stupid of me not to seek help.
On a positive note though, I have just had a phone call to say that the father -in-law will be released from hospital tomorrow.
On the down side, the boss is being a pain and this is the way it will be for the the next 4 weeks.
I really don't know if I've jumped to the right job, but whatever happens know I'm going, so I'll just have to make the best of it and hope that this is the job that'll make me.
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5 comments:
Don't feel ashamed about needing help, we all need it sometimes. Anti-depressants are prescribed for a reason, to help people cope, and as long as they're taken in moderation and people don't rely on them, there's no reason why you should feel bad about it.
I think once you change your job, it'll be like a new start. If you hate your present job, you've done the right thing by quitting. You've got to put yourself first sometimes!
It could be a symptom of depression, that you feel ashamed about it? Do try not to be, it's not something you can help, and it's only sensible to do something about it. I hope you feel better soon.
Thank you for your comments ladies.
I was having a bad couple of days but things will be vrighter now I have me little stash of happy pills.
I agree Z. I do think the feeling of shame is actually a sympton of the depression itself.
I'm a little aprehensive about the new job, but I'm really hoping for better things.
Yep, I agree with the above. These things can become circular and you end up worse off than before, so talking to a professional, the doctor in this case which is always the first port of call is the best thing you could have done, no doubt about it. And a new job, working for a bigger company, more new faces, definitely a great move. Good luck!
Hello Moggy and welcome.
Thanks for the comments and I completly agree that these things are a part of the cycle of depression but that was how I was feeling on Thursday. I had Friday off work and the weekend with Wifey and I feel much better about the home life. I sure the work life will be crap, but at least it's only for four more weeks!
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