From what we know my Dad died last Tuesday night in bed. I am thankful.
My dad was hard of hearing due to tinnitus which was the product of a lifetime working in or around aircraft. He was generally excluded in a social situation because he just couldn't hear what was going on. He had been having some health difficulties since about this time last year and in the spring he was diagnosed with heart failure. He was finding mobility a struggle and had been house bound for about 4 or 5 months. He was down with us only a few weeks ago and had a good time. He loves his grandson. "you're a grand little lad" are often said whilst ruffling the boy's hair. He said to me that he was feeling much better and the 4 stone, yes 4 stone, he had lost made him feel even better, although he did say he felt like he was on his last innings.
I fully expected the old sod to live on for years to come.
I'm sure he had regrets in life, most of us do, but he got to see his two sons educated, married and settled with children. There are elements of our life's that are not perfect, but generally my brother and I are happy. So what I'm trying to say is what better way to go? He wasn't in pain, just a little tired. He had all his mental faculties although he was hard of hearing. He did not endure a long and painful illness, quite simply his heart just stopped. I was not there and I don't know if he suffered yet I feel strangely confident that he didn't. In my own mind I know he went to bed and never woke up. I feel deeply sorry that he wasn't found for 5 days and that I wasn't with him, or at least near him, when he died, but on the whole I'm sort of happy. No dementure, no stroke, no cancer. I must take all these things as a positive.
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4 comments:
Death, though always sad, is not always a bad thing. Its sounds like as peaceful a passing as can be hoped.
Here's to the funeral being as joyous as possible. Try not to get tied up in too many knots organising it. My dad's was horrendous to get sorted, but the day itself was good.
That's exactly what I was getting at - death is not necessary a bad thing when the final weigh up occurs. I'm mostly positive but I was reduced to tears when my brother told me that there was a birthday card on the sideboard for my son that he had written and that it was ready to put in to the stamped and addressed envelope just ready to be posted in time to get here for his birthday yesterday.
Thanks for the advice on the funeral.
The biggest problem with my dad is that he was a horder. I have to go to Derbyshire this weekend to attempt to sort through his house.
My brother has organised everything so far as he is fairly local. He has had the worst jobs to do so far. My only input thus far is that the hurse and folliong cars must be Rolls-Royce's as my dad loved Rolls-Royce (he worked for them for 48 years)
My grandad and auntie both died peacefully in their sleep, and even though their deaths hit me hard, knowing that they didn't die in pain made it a lot easier to deal with.
The Boy's right about the funeral.
the card for the boy chokes me too. I love you honey and am always there for you and will help you through it. I will miss the old boy (your dad) as well - he deifinitely grew on me and I loved him, but he is in a peaceful and silent place and I do take comfort in that. I love you very much xxxxxxx
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